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Yuratuhl
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:08 am  
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French Faggot
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Zaryi wrote:
Yuratuhl wrote:
Zaryi wrote:
The inevitable 20 minute long blow-job in every porn scene in the history of ever. Especially when it's preceded by 30 seconds of going down on her.


Maybe she's just really good at edging.


Oral is fun to receive. It's almost more fun to give. It's not fun to watch some tweaked out porn star slobber over some steroid filled dudes cock.


Then don't watch porn. I rarely do.

Oral is way more fun to receive, though I'm not insensitive enough to take without giving.

If destruction exists, we must destroy everything.
Shuruppak Yuratuhl
Slaad Shrpk Breizh
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Dotzilla
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:44 am  
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oral isn't very fun to receive. takes too long. it's not very good for a warm-up either, i'd rather just get to fuckin'. the latter comment aside, i do enjoy performing oral on the ladies except when they fail to tell you their orgasm entails a massive deluge of warm salty fluid exploding outwards filling your nose and mouth and costing you 400 dollars to replace all the hotel sheets and mattress, all the while the girl sounds like nascar racers shifting gears. and it taking 45 minutes.

i dont suck. that girl was hard to get off.

Verily, I have often laughed at weaklings who thought themselves proud because they had no claws.
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Akiina
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:47 am  
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Oh dear.

Akiina - Priest - Royal Militia
Leeloo Minai Lekarariba-Laminai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
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Mns
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:48 am  
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MegaFaggot 5000
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Necrachilles wrote:
p.s. most "girly drinks" have more or the same alcohol content as a lot of beer. My friends always made fun of me and I'm like "Look guys, this is 7% and your beers are 4%. Back the fuck up." Legends of the Fall is amazing both sober and drunk, I couldn't finish it drunk due to laughing too hard.

Macro pisswater has 4%. Any redeemable beer has 5-12%, but its kinda hard to get drunk off the 10%+, mainly because if you're drinking those you're worth your salt and they're too filling to drink enough.

You can pat yourself on the back while you drink your Smirnoff Ice. I don't need to reassure my masculinity with a glass of Jameson.

RETIRED.
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Mayonaise[/armory]
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Jerkonaise[/armory]
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Necrachilles
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:58 am  
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Falcon PUNCH! Faggot
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Mns wrote:
Necrachilles wrote:
p.s. most "girly drinks" have more or the same alcohol content as a lot of beer. My friends always made fun of me and I'm like "Look guys, this is 7% and your beers are 4%. Back the fuck up." Legends of the Fall is amazing both sober and drunk, I couldn't finish it drunk due to laughing too hard.

Macro pisswater has 4%. Any redeemable beer has 5-12%, but its kinda hard to get drunk off the 10%+, mainly because if you're drinking those you're worth your salt and they're too filling to drink enough.

You can pat yourself on the back while you drink your Smirnoff Ice. I don't need to reassure my masculinity with a glass of Jameson.


I'm by no means bragging abotu girly drinks, my friends just drink cheap beer. It's just funny to me that they talk shit. Haven't been able to drink since New Years last year =/ Did like 10 shots and then took a nap, terrible idea.

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Weena
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 1:51 am  
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Fat Bottomed Faggot
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:53 pm
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[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdv-xWEaYvo[/youtube]

Skip to 7 minutes for relevance.

"Ok we aren't such things and birds are pretty advanced. They fly and shit from anywhere they want. While we sit on our automatic toilets, they're shitting on people and my car while a cool breeze tickles their anus. That's the life."
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Jubbergun
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 2:49 am  
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Old Conservative Faggot
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Most girls are terrible at oral, mainly because they aren't really interested in doing it and are just doing it because they think they're supposed to be doing it. Some girls just have no clue about the mechanics of the thing, and after some direction get better with practice. If you're a complete scumbag and can't/won't/don't care to stick with one girl for more than a few weeks at a time, you get to the point where you can tell which one you have. When it's the former, just let her know it's not obligatory and get down to the fucking. If it's the latter, let her know how to go down on what's up and give her some time, and she'll get better...hopefully.

As far as reciprocation, I have mastered the art to a degree that is nearly beyond the ability of mortal man, and I should probably be writing down what I know about that shit for the enrichment of humankind.

Your Pal,
Jubber

AKA "The Gun"
AKA "ROFeraL"

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Needhelp
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 2:56 am  
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Obtuse Oaf
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:O
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thegodslayer
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 7:45 am  
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Dotzilla wrote:
oral isn't very fun to receive. takes too long. it's not very good for a warm-up either, i'd rather just get to fuckin'. the latter comment aside, i do enjoy performing oral on the ladies except when they fail to tell you their orgasm entails a massive deluge of warm salty fluid exploding outwards filling your nose and mouth and costing you 400 dollars to replace all the hotel sheets and mattress, all the while the girl sounds like nascar racers shifting gears. and it taking 45 minutes.

i dont suck. that girl was hard to get off.


Nearly had my jaw dislocated one time, or at least I thought it was going to. Afterward I just looked at her and smiled triumphantly. :)

85 Mage Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
85 LOLKnight Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
85 Shaman Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
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Azelma
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 9:25 am  
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Here's the thing, most girls are terrible at oral and handjobs, so it's natural that most guys think oral sucks.

Unfortunately, these guys have never had good oral.

I've only been with one girl who gave porn-star type head. And oh man. It was awesome.

As for giving oral to girls, I love doing it, as long as she's nice and clean down there. Some of these girls think that they don't need to wash up before sex every time. Sorry, if you want me to head south of the boarder you need to be clean.

Azelma

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Grimmgor
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 10:38 am  
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Feckless Fool
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everytime i hear a dude say getting head is a bad thing, i think i'm in the twilight zone or something.

i mean really, whoever is giving it to you just sucks (durrr)
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Azelma
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 11:00 am  
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Grimmgor wrote:
everytime i hear a dude say getting head is a bad thing, i think i'm in the twilight zone or something.

i mean really, whoever is giving it to you just sucks (durrr)


QFT

Azelma

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thegodslayer
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 11:05 am  
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Kunckleheaded Knob
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Grimmgor wrote:
everytime i hear a dude say getting head is a bad thing, i think i'm in the twilight zone or something.

i mean really, whoever is giving it to you just sucks (durrr)


This ^

85 Mage Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
85 LOLKnight Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
85 Shaman Bleeding Hollow Bored with game so I let sub expire......
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Akiina
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 11:24 am  
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Grimmgor wrote:
everytime i hear a dude say getting head is a bad thing, i think i'm in the twilight zone or something.

i mean really, whoever is giving it to you just sucks (durrr)


Gonna have to agree here.

Akiina - Priest - Royal Militia
Leeloo Minai Lekarariba-Laminai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
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Krunkz
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 12:07 pm  
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Kunckleheaded Knob
Joined: Sat May 15, 2010 1:05 am
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Starbucks - what kinda yuppy doucher pays 6 bux for cup of sugar'd up coffee?

There are alot more but that is the #1 on my list.
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