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ITT: Aestu makes a good parent.

I thought I would make it a bit easier for you to simply call us all children.

The overabundance of terrible parents really only proves "if you were a parent you'd understand" is a weak argument. If we are to assume that no one can understand a position they are not currently in, there is never a reason for debate at all.

Dvergar /
Quisling

Not all parents are good parents, but they all understand the ins and outs of having to deal with children better than people who never deal with children. It's foolish to say otherwise.

Great now I'm thinking about Aestu raising children.

On an unrelated note, my heart rate is now increasing, I'm sweating profusely, and fearful of the future.

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Yeah my surgeon analogy was a bit weak. Dvergar's and Aestu's arguments still don't hold weight for me here.

Aestu, you are arguing that because bad parents exist, that it's false to say parents are more experienced with raising children than a person who has no children.

This just isn't universally true. The man in question knows his daughter better than you do. He knows her history and all of his past mistakes better than you do. Parenting is not something that you can learn simply from a book. It's trial and error and a constant learning process. True, some parents never get it quite right....but that doesn't mean an armchair parent is automatically better than them.

Boredalt is right in that it seems like you guys are approaching it from a child's perspective. Like Grimmgor who has unresolved step-daddy issues, you're projecting your own parents' failures onto this situation.

You are not a better parent than any other parent - you've never been tested, you've never had to parent.

If we were talking about toddlers and grade school kids you'd have a point. The girl was what, 15 16 something (I don't give a fuck I never read the article)? That's when parents have the most trouble, and we've all gone through it. The idea that we couldn't possibly know how to parent is ludicrous. Knocking some bimbo up doesn't give you super parenting powers, people are just as likely to be wrong and make mistakes whether they've had kids or not. It's foolish to say otherwise.

Dvergar /
Quisling

Again, you're ignoring the fact that parents know their kids better than you do.

Parenting isn't like a WoW-encounter; it's completely un-scripted and unique for each family as a near-infinite number of variable will take their toll. What worked for you as a kid might not have worked for me and likewise is true. "Well, she's 15 or 16!" Right. She's had 15 or 16 years of experiences, most likely unequaled to your own on many levels, which helped make her who she is today. The parents and people involved in her life have a better idea of "what's best" than you guys. All you have is speculation and "I was a kid once, too!"

Not necessarily true. I could just as easily argue that a parent is more likely to project their own hopes and fears onto a child, to the exclusion of its actual identity, than a stranger who has no stake in the situation.



Why do you think I'd make a poor parent?

I'd argue the evidence is, I would make an excellent parent, given how seriously I take it and my appreciation of the fact that many parents are bad.



Failure is a better teacher than success.



Sure I am. I could do a better job than some people. Or do you disagree?



And that has accomplished...what? Is that enough for most parents these days to make good decisions?

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

Well, having never been a parent sure as hell doesn't make an opinion about parenting more qualified. Let me ask you a few things that won't just change your views and attitudes, but will rock them to the core...someday when you have answers to them:

Tell me how you felt when you watched your child's birth. When he first came home, did you sit by his crib all night watching the rise and fall of his chest, afraid he would just stop breathing? What was it like to teach your baby to walk? How did you feel when you heard him say his first words? Were you consumed with fear when he was in the hospital with a raging fever? Remember teaching him the ABC's and numbers? Did you let him sleep with you when he had bad dreams? Were you proud or afraid when you put him on the bus for his first day of school? What advice did you give him about his first girlfriend? Did your heart break when she broke his? Did you enjoy coaching his little league team? Have you ever sat up waiting for him to come home when he missed curfew? Where did you teach him drive, and were you terrified when you first handed him the keys, and what rules did you impose on his driving? How did you deal with it when his grandmother died? What did you expect of him concerning his education? How did you feel when he graduated from high school? What advice did you give him concerning college? What kind of trouble did he get into, and how did you discipline him? Did your discipline have any affect? Are you proud of the way he turned out?

Sentimental bullshit? Maybe, but you won't come through it unchanged.

Some of you know a bit about these things, but there is so much to come...and most of it is great, but it ain't easy. I know I sound like an old fuck here (and I guess I am), but one of these days, most of you are going to be amazed at how hard that parenting truck hits you, and you'll say, "I had no idea." But, I know you can't admit that at this point.

Boredalt - 80 Dwarf Priest - Dissension

Its funny because you're still talking.

RETIRED.
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Mayonaise[/armory]
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Jerkonaise[/armory]

Strawman argument.



False; a lot of people just don't give a shit.



I think you sound like someone who thinks there's only one book in the library...metaphorically speaking.

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

Yea, we know. You could also "easily argue" that the afternoon sky isn't blue and that it's actually a shade of purple, but that doesn't mean your argument is worth a shit, nor does it mean you're going to win that argument.


My son slept on the floor at the foot of our bed for a few weeks in a 'Moses basket' and whenever he'd make any noise I was out of bed checking on him... and when he didn't make any noise I was out of bed checking on him because I thought he might have SIDS'd himself. Hell, even to this day if he's unusually quiet on his monitor I go in and check on him just to make sure he didn't suffocate himself with a pillow, blanket, stuffed animal or whatever else. -__-


Considering you think you know the right way for someone to parent their child, I'd have assumed the same about you.

lol, so every child is a unique snowflake and every kid's journey from newborn to adult is different. I agree. That's why the argument that the only valid opinions are of those who have kids is hogwash. I didn't give my opinion on this guy, just on the whole 'only parents know' bs. If the argument had been "you're not this kids parents and know nothing about the family", that's valid.

Dvergar /
Quisling

*It's

How would you know, you've never been a grammar teacher?!?! (srsly tho, gud one)

Dvergar /
Quisling