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That's different. Your dog died. The fact you put him to sleep is irrelevant; his time had come and no one made the call but Mother Nature.

That's not comparable to making the choice to end a relationship then dragging it out so one can pretend your motives were somehow less than selfish.


Intricacies? lol. like I said, pretense in an effort to sound deep.

What's your basis for saying I'm a robot?

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

My dog could have easily lived for another year or two. He would have probably been in pain and not able to function very well on his own but I'd still have my dog. THAT would be selfish.

Let me pose it a better way and then perhaps I shall call it quits.

I love horses. So I buy a horse. However, I live in an apartment. Not very much room for the horse and I'd really like very much for it to stay with me. However, I know a horse needs to have lots of space to run around and is only going to be miserable. I love this horse but I know it'd be happier elsewhere so I end up getting rid of it. Is it still selfish, if I loved this horse as much as I loved my dog, to not want to get a new pet right away? Perhaps later but not the same day or anything.

Serial monogamists are not motivated by such considerations. Proof being that freelovers and long-term monogamists alike can do their thing, maintain relationships, for very long periods without the need to seek breakups. Realistically, breakups are typically driven by one whim or another.

Further breaking the analogy is that you are talking about animals that cannot fathom human motivations. It's an inherently unequal relationship, and that necessitates playing something of a double game. A dog can't know you mean to put it to sleep nor a horse that it's being put to pasture. That doesn't apply to human relationships. Humans are autonomous, and you can find your peace.

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

It's cool man, I don't expect you to get it or understand. You have an entirely different way of thinking. All I can tell you is, the world isn't always so black and white. There are people who actually are sincere in their need to take time and there are people such as you say who are purely being selfish. Perhaps one of us will see what the other is saying in the future.

Agree to disagree.

Oh look, it's become one of these threads again.

Dvergar /
Quisling

Yeah. This is why we don't have nice things.

It's not "one of those threads". It was a simple conversation that is over now. You guys are turning in into one of those threads!

I don't know what else to say that's on topic, get back to me when I'm not exhausted.

I think serial monogamists are just selfish and lazy.

They want all the benefits of a monogamist relationship...they love the "honeymoon" phase. But when a relationship matures and it starts to become difficult at times to deal with the other person, they dump them and move on to the next person that they can honeymoon with.

In essence, I think they are "in love with being in love" These are the kinds of people who will most likely be divorced multiple times, and have issues with infidelity.

To them, if you aren't feeling butterflies every second you are with your significant other, than the relationship is flawed. If you aren't always excited by your significant other, than it's time to move on. They are a by-product of Hollywood lies, in many cases (for the women) warped feminists ideals, and good ole-fashioned American selfishness.

Whether by way of the mean or pure projection or genuine understanding, Azelma's got it. Though honestly I think he just wants a pat on the head.

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

You know me so well. You gave me a pat on the head last week when I gave my opinion about the world singing Kumbaya and I had a wonderful string of days as a result. I'm just trying to replicate that success.

In reality, I think the saying "Even a blind squirrel finds a nut every once in a while" is more appropriate here.




I don't know much, as you are always sure to point out, but I actually do have some understanding of relationships.

Is she the one always breaking it off?

If so, date her, break it off, see if she get's mindfucked.

See. This makes sense to me. Do you think it's something they can't help? Or something they knowingly do?

Jesus fucking christ.

I'm honestly thinking that the only way to solve this shit once and for all is to ban Aestu. I can't chainsaw surgery literally every thread.

RETIRED.
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Mayonaise[/armory]
[armory loc="US,Bleeding Hollow"]Jerkonaise[/armory]

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

Probably a bit of both.

I genuinely think some of these people could have abandonment/confidence/emotional issues stemming from childhood. In that sense, something makes them feel the need to be "loved" and makes them unable to be comfortable in a relationship as it goes through its natural change/growth. They are pretty much addicts in that sense.

Also, I bet many of them have never had models for healthy relationships.

That said, I think they knowingly end things, often very prematurely, and knowingly seek out new prospects in an attempt to fill their void/protect themselves from getting hurt. They never allow themselves to mature - they keep a juvenile outlook on love.

Also, it shouldn't be overlooked that they are able to do this (usually because they are relatively attractive, good at getting new mates, etc.) so they have no desire to pursue something deeper and more meaningful.

A fat ugly guy who gets in a relationship is more likely to stay in that relationship simply because he doesn't have an abundance of other prospects. I know that sounds harsh, but it's true.



I was in a 5 year relationship...I have yet to even get anywhere close to it again (I've had many instances of a few weeks of dating/courtship that never translated into something else). I'm someone who can't just find a new girl at the drop of a hat. And when I do find a girl, I'm fiercely loyal and willing to stay committed and work on things even when the honeymoon ends. It's probably resulted in me getting less "action" but I'm someone who's playing for keeps. I guess I'm a "committed monogamist" haha

I think this is a better way in general, because it's resulted in me being single for the last 4 years - focusing more on myself, and learning much more about who I am and what I want.

That's the other problem with serial monogamists, they never ever have to be alone. If you're alone, you can't escape yourself.