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 Post subject: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 1:29 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18241494


Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 1:32 pm  
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Feckless Fool
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holy fuck


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 1:36 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
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Fuck yeah, about time we get this apocalypse started.


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 1:37 pm  
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Stupid Schlemiel
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I'm glad I talked with my girlfriend about our plan for the zombie apocalypse. We've discovered the local bar and probably has the most defensive value around here.


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 3:25 pm  
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Blathering Buffoon
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Sounds like someone took way too much PCP


s^ | Kay
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 Post subject: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 3:45 pm  
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Str8 Actin Dude
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Kayllaira wrote:
Sounds like someone took way too much PCP


If everyone was strung out on PCP, this never would have happened.


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 5:04 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
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Kayllaira wrote:
Sounds like someone took way too much PCP


Only an ignorant person would leap to the conclusion that this incident was caused by drug use.

Your area of study is nursing, no? So how much have you actually studied zombies? Are you aware that nocturnal activity, ataxia, loss of language skills, and an insatiable hunger for human flesh are all classic signs of zombification? If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, why do you arrogantly assume that it is something other than a duck?

Zombification is a culturally universal phenomenon. It affects members of both genders and all races. Many books that I am sure you have not read have been written about its causes, symptoms and proper treatment.

The condition is grossly under-reported because of lack of education and the tyranny of the pharmaceutical industry, that insists on overdiagnosing conditions such as rabies and mange, and underdiagnosing the condition of zombification. There is also the nefarious influence of the anti-freedom lobby, which denies the reality of zombification to facilitate their efforts to deny Americans their constitutional right to own shotguns for home defense against invasions by zombies, redcoats, and redcoat zombies.

Because of lack of education and the political bias against the field, classes taught by zombie experts do not get access to federal grants. This is stupid and wrong, and leads to stupid and wrong things like nursing students insisting that classic symptoms of zombification are due to something else, but if you really want, you can read books or even do a Google search to educate yourself about the condition.


Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 5:40 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
Joined: Fri May 14, 2010 9:34 pm
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Aestu wrote:
Kayllaira wrote:
Sounds like someone took way too much PCP


Only an ignorant person would leap to the conclusion that this incident was caused by drug use.

Your area of study is nursing, no? So how much have you actually studied zombies? Are you aware that nocturnal activity, ataxia, loss of language skills, and an insatiable hunger for human flesh are all classic signs of zombification? If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, why do you arrogantly assume that it is something other than a duck?

Zombification is a culturally universal phenomenon. It affects members of both genders and all races. Many books that I am sure you have not read have been written about its causes, symptoms and proper treatment.

The condition is grossly under-reported because of lack of education and the tyranny of the pharmaceutical industry, that insists on overdiagnosing conditions such as rabies and mange, and underdiagnosing the condition of zombification. There is also the nefarious influence of the anti-freedom lobby, which denies the reality of zombification to facilitate their efforts to deny Americans their constitutional right to own shotguns for home defense against invasions by zombies, redcoats, and redcoat zombies.

Because of lack of education and the political bias against the field, classes taught by zombie experts do not get access to federal grants. This is stupid and wrong, and leads to stupid and wrong things like nursing students insisting that classic symptoms of zombification are due to something else, but if you really want, you can read books or even do a Google search to educate yourself about the condition.


Go on


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 6:14 pm  
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Blathering Buffoon
Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2007 12:00 am
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Aestu wrote:
Kayllaira wrote:
Sounds like someone took way too much PCP


Only an ignorant person would leap to the conclusion that this incident was caused by drug use.

Your area of study is nursing, no? So how much have you actually studied zombies? Are you aware that nocturnal activity, ataxia, loss of language skills, and an insatiable hunger for human flesh are all classic signs of zombification? If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, why do you arrogantly assume that it is something other than a duck?

Zombification is a culturally universal phenomenon. It affects members of both genders and all races. Many books that I am sure you have not read have been written about its causes, symptoms and proper treatment.

The condition is grossly under-reported because of lack of education and the tyranny of the pharmaceutical industry, that insists on overdiagnosing conditions such as rabies and mange, and underdiagnosing the condition of zombification. There is also the nefarious influence of the anti-freedom lobby, which denies the reality of zombification to facilitate their efforts to deny Americans their constitutional right to own shotguns for home defense against invasions by zombies, redcoats, and redcoat zombies.

Because of lack of education and the political bias against the field, classes taught by zombie experts do not get access to federal grants. This is stupid and wrong, and leads to stupid and wrong things like nursing students insisting that classic symptoms of zombification are due to something else, but if you really want, you can read books or even do a Google search to educate yourself about the condition.


The police believe he was high on a "new potent form of LSD", which is most likely of the DOx variation. It's really common in Florida for people to pass it off as LSD. The PCP thing was a joke, it's not common here, but similar things are. Random RCs are running rampant through Miami/Orlando/Tampa, and this is likely one of them. It's happened before. Also totally possible that the guy had a psychotic break D:


s^ | Kay


Last edited by Kayllaira on Tue May 29, 2012 12:16 am, edited 1 time in total.
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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 9:43 pm  
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Quote:
"What's happening is whenever we see that a person has taken all of his clothes off and has become violent, it's indicative of this excited delirium that's caused by overdose of drugs," said Armando Aguilar of the Miami Fraternal Order of Police. "What's happening is inside their body their organs are burning up alive."

Armando Aguilar of the Miami Fraternal Order of Police linked two relating symptoms and pinpoints a drug. Are there more cases of flesh eating in this particular form of LSD?


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 Post subject: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 9:44 pm  
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Str8 Actin Dude
Joined: Fri May 14, 2010 3:33 pm
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Wtb MOAR Aestu satire


Brawlsack

Taking an extended hiatus from gaming
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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2012 10:43 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 3:18 pm
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Credit where its due, that was pretty funny aestu.


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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2012 12:26 am  
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Blathering Buffoon
Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2007 12:00 am
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Xeoni wrote:
Quote:
"What's happening is whenever we see that a person has taken all of his clothes off and has become violent, it's indicative of this excited delirium that's caused by overdose of drugs," said Armando Aguilar of the Miami Fraternal Order of Police. "What's happening is inside their body their organs are burning up alive."

Armando Aguilar of the Miami Fraternal Order of Police linked two relating symptoms and pinpoints a drug. Are there more cases of flesh eating in this particular form of LSD?


haha, i'm not sure about flesh eating, but research chemicals like DOx and other designer drugs (bath salts, for example) are generally tied to psychotic episodes. Obviously it'd be a very individual thing. People who have psychoses generally are affected differently, and sometimes psychoses can be permanently brought out for the first time after using these drugs.


s^ | Kay
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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2012 1:57 am  
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Old Conservative Faggot
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The fact that Aestu made a funny and this many people missed it is a testament to how even the things he says seriously are kind of a joke. Not even Rikki and Nechra can troll at that level.

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 Post subject: Re: Florida State Police Now Recruiting Zombie Hunters
PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2012 2:09 am  
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Feckless Fool
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Troll on, I'm still interested.


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