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 Post subject: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 6:20 pm  
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Feckless Fool
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2008 2:53 pm
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I went into Harris Teeter today. It's a supermarket if you don't know or have one near you. I talked to the store owner and after he interviewed me, he asked me if I was willing to submit a drug test. I instinctively said yes as to not blow my cover, but I don't know how soon he's going to test me. He said he would call me Friday and he would keep in touch, so I don't know if the drug test is two days from now (in which case I'm fucked) or if it's a week or two from now.

Assuming that the test is in two weeks, what else can I do other than go on jogs with a hoody (sweating), drink lots of tea/water (natural detox), or buy a detox product? I really want this job because it pays a whopping $8.50, which for my unemployed, inexperienced, uneducated ass, is great.


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 6:34 pm  
Kunckleheaded Knob
Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2010 1:08 pm
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Buy fake piss.


http://www.wowarmory.com/character-shee ... n=Mazeltov
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 6:58 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:01 pm  
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Fat Bottomed Faggot
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:53 pm
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Cranberry Juice in large quantities seems to work for my army buddy.


"Ok we aren't such things and birds are pretty advanced. They fly and shit from anywhere they want. While we sit on our automatic toilets, they're shitting on people and my car while a cool breeze tickles their anus. That's the life."
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:07 pm  
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Obtuse Oaf
Joined: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:44 am
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WTS [My Piss]


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:28 pm  
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Stupid Schlemiel
Joined: Fri May 14, 2010 4:53 pm
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become Canadian


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:41 pm  
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Obtuse Oaf
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Jushiro wrote:
become Canadian

or get a job where you don't have access to a pharmacy

idunno, i've never had to take a drug test


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:52 pm  
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French Faggot
Joined: Tue Jun 10, 2008 1:15 pm
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rikkilake wrote:
Jushiro wrote:
become Canadian

or get a job where you don't have access to a pharmacy

idunno, i've never had to take a drug test


Same, and I've worked as a substitute teacher.


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:59 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
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Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:07 pm  
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Blathering Buffoon
Joined: Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:52 pm
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niacin, in large quantities will help. here's a little known fact about your average drug test. you pee in the cup, and some technician dips a strip in it to test for THC. the strip must turn a certain shade of blue to be considered a positive. otherwise it's considered unequivocal and you're given the benefit of the doubt. you have to have a SERIOUS amount of THC in your body to turn that strip blue. like, smoke every day THC. it's relatively hard unless you're a habitual smoker.

also, congrats on applying for a job while simultaneously smoking. did it not occur to you that you'd have to piss? use your head, man. or apply somewhere else. i work at Trader Joe's, which is also a grocery store. but i can smoke while at work and get paid $11 an hour.


Verily, I have often laughed at weaklings who thought themselves proud because they had no claws.
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:11 pm  
Kunckleheaded Knob
Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2010 1:08 pm
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Yuratuhl wrote:
rikkilake wrote:
Jushiro wrote:
become Canadian

or get a job where you don't have access to a pharmacy

idunno, i've never had to take a drug test


Same, and I've worked as a substitute teacher.



We just have to get fingerprinted 50 fucking times instead. I swear CIA FBI state local police DOJ and the rest of America must all have my fingerprint by now.


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:18 pm  
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Kunckleheaded Knob
Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2010 12:43 am
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Location: Chesapeake, VA
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We use crappy spit swab tests, they aren't very accurate... now whether Harris Teeter sends you to a lab to pee, who knows.


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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:28 pm  
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Querulous Quidnunc
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:19 pm
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Dotzilla wrote:
niacin, in large quantities will help.


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Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:29 pm  
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Blathering Buffoon
Joined: Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:52 pm
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Aestu wrote:
Dotzilla wrote:
niacin, in large quantities will help.


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i would liken it to more of a flush, but yes. by the way, i love that picture. i didn't know a color one existed.


Verily, I have often laughed at weaklings who thought themselves proud because they had no claws.
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 Post subject: Re: Passing a Drug Test
PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 8:42 pm  
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Feckless Fool
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2008 2:53 pm
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Dotzilla wrote:
also, congrats on applying for a job while simultaneously smoking. did it not occur to you that you'd have to piss? use your head, man. or apply somewhere else. i work at Trader Joe's, which is also a grocery store. but i can smoke while at work and get paid $11 an hour.

How was I supposed to know that I was to be drug tested before I slice meat and place vegetables for display? And I didn't smoke simultaneously, not even in the same day. I smoked the night before of the interview.

I am a habitual smoker, and I regularly smoke once a day.


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