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On the one hand, I agree because I don't like ruining things for other people, but on the other hand I disagree because if she doesn't care about her relationship I don't see why I should--especially since it's obviously not going to last because she does shit like that.
The slutty school teacher I was fooling around with stopped seeing me to get back with an old boyfriend, but she kept on texting me because she wanted me to flirt with her to make her feel good about herself. I told her just the other day that if she's bored, lonely, and in need of attention, she either needs to let the boyfriend fill that role or dump him and come back to me. I haven't heard back from her...and I'm pretty happy about it since the sex was "meh" at best, she has two dogs, and she's into hair metal and professional wrestling.
Worst thing that's happened lately was I had a 'date' (I am using this word very loosely here) with a 'friend' (more of a close acquaintance, honestly). She has qualities I admire, she's pretty, and behaves with a rare degree of dignity. She has been 'down on her luck' by her own standards, because her career path didn't pan out the way she wanted, and she's moved back home with her parents and is working at a winery doing sales/tastings. I felt a great deal of empathy for her because it wasn't that long ago that I was in a similar unemployed/underemployed situation, so I made sure she never had to pick up a check when she was asked along to do things.
There was a production of War Horse at the Kennedy Center, and she wanted to see it. Anything to do with horses appeals to her, as her 'career,' such as it was, was working with horses. She gave it up because even with her degree (equestrian science/arts or some such) and riding background she'd never make more than the equivalent of minimum wage with room and board. I wanted her attention, so I bought tickets for us to see the show...and splurged. I bought orchestra seating near the stage, which was around $400 for the two tickets.
I didn't tell her how much I spent on the tickets, and I tried to keep things casual. There shouldn't have been any weirdness, but I couldn't get more than a sentence out of her the entire night. I picked her up about two hours before the show so we could drive into DC and get parked and settled in before the show. There was no conversation. I'd ask a question to get her talking, I'd get one-word-to-one-sentence answers in response, and it would be quiet for another couple of minutes. The whole night went on like that. It was awkward and uncomfortable.
So my friend Beth texted her about it, since they're girly-girl friends, and told her that I'd said that she was very quiet and disengaged the whole evening. Her response was that it was just because she was tired. I thought that was a reasonable answer, until I contacted her to do one of our usual get-together things, and she completely blew me off. I tried to drop off a few bottles of one of my recent brews (pumpkin cider) for her, because she had been interested in it, but again, completely rebuffed.
I took Beth's sister to see Yellowcard and some never-heard-of-them band they were touring with for her birthday. I told her about it. I'm pretty sure when another woman's opinion of the situation is "what a cunt" that you've probably violated at least a minor rule of interpersonal interaction. Her other insightful observation: that's even worse than the friend box.
So I've come to the conclusion I continue dating the sort of women I usually date, like slutty school teacher, and have to deal with that insanity, or I keep pushing forward on the "no more crazy" route where I'm good enough to drop money on expensive outings but not good enough to even bother talking to during the course of the outing. I'd like to say that I'm torn or that I shouldn't be put off by the first horribly failed attempt, but slutty school teacher and all the nutty chicks I dated before didn't cost me a bunch of money to spend time with and not only talked to me but in some cases invited me to sweaty naked fun times. There are also a lot of nutty chicks, and not so many like the one I took to the theater.
Like I said, it's the circle of life.
Your Pal,
Jubber
AKA "The Gun"
AKA "ROFeraL"
World Renowned Mexican Forklift Artiste
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