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Wrong

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

But but but

You don't keep in touch with me

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I know that my personality is offensive to most people. Although I wish it wasn't, I have come to accept this. Some people find it okay, most don't, whatever, most people don't like me and that's just how it is.

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

Tact and sugar coating are not one and the same, nor are brutal honesty and blatant disrespect. Diplomacy is knowing when and where to use each, and to what degree. I think you have a lot of valuable insight which the value tends to become lost via your delivery. Perhaps you view it as a character flaw on the part of your audience to not be able to discern your good intentions from your method of delivery.

If this is the case, I relate all too well, though one could make the argument that it falls on one's shoulders to convince and compel their target audience without alienating them in the process, that your duty to the world exists in the form of maintaining persuasiveness over self-dignity and as a result seeing more widespread results.

I'm incredibly impatient with people in general, and I share your sentiment at times that people who are too stupid to understand certain things are not worth saving and are not deserving of a better world.

At the same time, we're each human as well, subject to being wrong just as we're subject to being right. Quite obviously, perspective on right and wrong can become murky. It's my belief that those who can be saved are worth saving, and shouldn't suffer as a result of the ignorant.

I think you can sometimes come across as abrasive without intending to, and your message is lost on people which further infuriates you.

Brawlsack

Taking an extended hiatus from gaming

It's not that simple. People are jaded. A lot of the time, I find that offending people is the only way to make them sit up. After all, there's no shortage of people willing to kiss every ass in this world.

Offending people instantly puts them on active defense. Forces them to engage the argument. Once they realize it's not really directed at them, anger often turns to curiosity; the jaded exterior has been penetrated. Of course, sometimes it doesn't, and often they take the substance of the argument personally quite apart from the manner in which it is delivered.

As I said, I accept this is a casualty-intensive approach.

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

I understand your approach, I just don't see how it benefits you in any way. Sure, debate is fun....sure getting people to think outside the box and think about issues and themselves critically is noble....but what's the cost?


I'm not being harsh, but when you sit there and tell us how lonely etc. you are...then you cling stubbornly to this approach that you know turns a great many people off....it just seems stupid.


The world is not black and white....not everyone who would be your friend is just trying to kiss your ass, so putting on this confrontational song and dance is just shooting yourself in the foot.



I think Zaryi is the most perfect example of your strategy ultimately failing you. Obviously it's he-said she-said...but I know at least part of you really did (and probably still does) care for her on some level. You liked when she came and visited you. Yet, she, like all people, is not perfect and has very clear flaws. In your effort to help her and fix these flaws (and maybe protect yourself?), you pushed her away....blew the whole thing up, so now only ashes remain. What was the point?

You can help people, challenge people, improve people....all while maintaining a strong relationship with them. There's a thing called constructive criticism....it's real, I assure you.

Bottom line, you don't have to be an insufferable git....but part of you likes it. The part of you that isn't happy with the results just needs to realize that it's just getting in your way, and you do have the power to change it.




inb4 Aestu calls me a moron kiss ass who knows nothing about anything.

That is the problem. You are examining the approach based on a faulty premise, that self-interest is what drives me. I am at some level very idealistic. I truly believe that people have a moral obligation to do their part to change the world by talking about things.

And it does work. Very slowly. That is how opinions evolve and the world slowly progresses. It has happened in the past and it continues to happen every day.

There is a benefit that is also lost on you. Conflict is inherently beneficial. Beliefs and approaches are challenged, tangibles are better understood, experience is gained. I've gained a great deal of wisdom and experience from challenging things when I could have not done so.



Merely because I dislike something does not mean I see it as a problem that needs to be solved.



You're right, it's not. Likewise, merely because someone is the object of confrontation - friendly or otherwise - does not mean they are evil or wrong. Confrontation is a good in and of itself.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agonism



I am guessing you are proceeding on the basis of what Zaryi told you. Not only is it untrue, it's contrary to truth.

I did like it when she came and visited me. I had also been wary of it because I was concerned that it might not change our relationship for the better; the status quo had been acceptable. I was right in the end, although it wasn't immediately obvious.

I did try to help her fix her flaws. I gave up when it became increasingly clear that there was nothing more that could be done and I wasn't willing to accept them in the relationship. It was a simple, equivocal decision.

The relationship didn't "blow up". After we ceased to be romantically involved, I continually tried to mend fences with her. She affected interest while behaving in a shallow and manipulative manner. I didn't like being used for her gratification, so I walked away. It was and is unfortunate.

Would I have done some things differently? Sure. But, as some guy said, there's a difference between an error and a mistake.



And I didn't. Actually, didn't even occur to me to do so. What does that indicate?

Aestu of Bleeding Hollow...

Nihilism is a copout.

Wish in one hand and shit in the other. Observe which one fills up first.

Your Pal,
Jubber

AKA "The Gun"
AKA "ROFeraL"

World Renowned Mexican Forklift Artiste