Looking to boost our guild level and statistics, we are now offering a 50g repair allowance for non-raiders. There are no criteria for joining; anyone interested may join the guild, sit in gchat, and benefit from a 50g daily repair allowance.
We are also recruiting the following for the following CORE positions:
Dramamonger This guy can set water on fire. Whatever it is, whomever, in any setting, he'll find a way to turn it into an argument, then go QQ on the forums. Has gotten five former friends' accounts banned. Brings infamy to any guild in which he resides. Never raids. Why is he in the guild? Truth to be told, the GM and officers are just too terrified to remove him for fear of OMG DRAMAZ. Besides...he gets the name of the guild out there, and bump the recruitment thread.
Fisherman Maybe he's Albert Einstein. Or Charlie Gordon. Who can fathom the banality of a human mind that enjoys fishing...for hours...and hours...and hours? You'd think he's a bot, but casual conversations during the activity in question quickly debunk this obvious assumption. He's fished up the turtle three times and is still at it, as if he has some depraved vendetta against halibut. Still, he boosts the guild /fished achievement, so who cares?
Booster He thinks the guild is Paradise on Azeroth and wants to share it with everyone. He pushes the guild to everyone, getting his little brother's best buddy or his wife's bridge partners or randoms from trade or that three-hour Grim Batol run to whisper officers for invite. Oh well, at least they generate guild XP.
PvP Bro May not, in fact, be from the Central Valley. Uses the word "bro" more than every other word in his vocabulary combined. Living proof that anyone can get 2300 in any bracket. Has a seven-digit gold wealth, partly from selling five hundred Wrathful tabards, but mostly left over from fiendish wintrading in TBC. Is personally responsible for every PvP achievement the PvE guild has. Carried to victory by his BWD trinket. Never misses an occasion to tell the PvE bros how easy nerding up raids is.
Altaholic Has 12 85s and twice again as many 80s, spread across four accounts. Has Loremaster six times over. Personally generates enough guild XP to bring his very own guild to the cap each week, but instead levelled guild rep just to get each of his alts a Dark Phoenix minipet.
This program will be a going concern with no end-date.
You will not be permitted to raid with us (although you certainly may apply) This program is strictly intended to improve our guild ranking.
In addition, if you earn the achievement "Turtles All The Way Down" while in-guild, you will earn a 10000g prize! If you catch Mr. Pinchy, you will earn a 5000g prize! PST an officer in-game if interested.
Aestu of Bleeding Hollow... Nihilism is a copout.
Last edited by Aestu on Tue Feb 01, 2011 7:52 am, edited 3 times in total.
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